3
I shouldn’t be here
videography. sound design. cinema. web 2.0. recording. social networking. mobile media. blogging. music performance. web design.
My level of skill and knowledge in the list above varies greatly, but the one thing they all have in common is that they are passions of mine. The telling of stories, the movement of information, the composition of sound and music, the instantaneous communication between people on opposite sides of the earth….these are the things that I love and that, if given the choice, I would dedicate my personal and professional time to.
I think what draws me to these pursuits is the fact that they all have the ability to affect such a large number of people at a profoundly deep level. I look at the work of Jason, Laren, and Bobby with the “Invisible Children” documentary and I am inspired. A couple of GL2 cameras and a mac and they were able to start a movement that is changing the world. I look at the work of the band MAE and their decision to bypass the record labels in order to help raise money to build houses for those less fortunate. Their efforts have already raised thousands of dollars towards the cause.
My passions are not merely the geeky pursuits of an individual who enjoys shiny gadgets, but rather I believe my passions are the means to opportunities that could allow a technology evangelist such as myself to be a part of something that is so much larger than I am.
The issue that I am facing now is that, despite my wide range of interests and passions, I have found myself in a point in life in which I am scarcely able to pursue any of my passions on a daily, weekly, or even a monthly basis. This could be for a variety of reasons. It could be any combination of my education, lack of opportunities, my past choices, or even laziness. Whatever the reason may be, I am not where I feel I should be, at least in regards to how I spend my time professionally and personally. Don’t get me wrong. I love my life right now. I am living with the girl that I love, in one of the most fascinating cities anyone could ask for.
But I can’t help but feel that I am wasting my time and my talents. I should be doing so much more with my life.
I am not sure how to get past this. Do I lack the vision and personal drive to get past this proverbial brick wall? When i dwell on these things, I get to the point in which I get so excited, that I am ready to quit my job and pursue my passions full time…but then I get scared when faced with the realities of my bills, mortgage, and day to day responsibilities. Is personal drive really enough to make dreams a reality?
I hope and pray that one day I can find myself in a place in which my faith, time, money, and passions are all working towards a unified goal and purpose. Sadly though, that day is not today. Today I still need to fight through the onslaught of excel sheets, emails, and daily repetition. I suppose I can start by tackling the one thing I actually have control over: my free time. My workplace pays the bills and while I am there they rightfully dictate how I should spend those 8 hours a day. My free time is my own however and any failure to use it properly and productively would be no one’s fault but my own.
I refuse to be content with mediocrity. I will not stay somewhere simply because it meets my needs. God has placed these passions in me for a reason, and I intent to pursue them and use them….as soon as I figure out how 
[dan]
fantanstic!
“Climb that wall you homo!”
…. This is from Arrested Development, not my own mind. You’ll do fine but I do have a career that you could pursue… The resurgent industry of FCAD’s needs some people to head the movement. Could be you…
I hear you buddy. Maybe we can combat stability, contentedness, and suburban entitlement together. Let’s break that mold. Remember, there are very few things in life that are as important as we make them out to be.
Miss yah buddy.